How can i improve my dissertation?

According to the feeback, there should be more discussion in the dissertation.
The feeback shows my research should have added more research methods. This is another part which should be improved.
About my dissertation plans, these are two mainly concern for improving the dissertation.

sports topic

For my dissertation, i will write about sports in the UK relate to the events industry.
The topic can be any types of sport, which are popular in the uk.
And i will search about how to do a sport event and what is the culture in the event.

Find a easy topice for your dissertation

The hardest thing about a dissertation is doing the primary research, so pick a topic that you can easily conduct a focus group about, or a questionnaire, and do something that is emotive to other people so they will want to get involved and talk to you about. All the secondary research about branding will be easier and you have (I guess) a whole year to put together bits from books and websites.

The difference between presention and spoken English

The difference between presention and spoken English

The difference betwee presention and spoken English is things like grammar! In a class, you will find out how things should be written down, but you will often say things in a very different way. It does not matter which country you are from - you must be aware that what is taught in lessons is not the same as speaking the language! You will be taught what the correct way of saying something is, but not necessarily what people say in normal conversations, for example the correct word is Television, but we say "telly" or "t.v.". We do not say 'would you like a cup of coffee?' - we just say 'do you want a coffee?' - or even just 'coffee?'!!